So many questions we have about life. More questions than answers. Will our lives truly be less than exciting should we have all the answers? Are questions meant to be lived out rather than answered? Without questions there will be no drive to explore, to discover what life has in stored for us. Questions keep us on our edge. Questions also unsettle us. Questions question our sanity. Perhaps in living out the questions we will find our answers. The question is, how. How do we live out our questions? Perhaps the answer is just to simply be.

On the front page of Home dated October 18, 2006 bears the news of a passing of Ms Mary Matthew.

The former executive director of the Samaritans of Singapore succumbed to lung cancer on Sunday. Ms Mary Matthew’s passing is a great loss to many whom she had counselled. She had started a programme, Healing Bridge, in 2003, to counsel those who had lost someone to suicide, and had over the years given hope to those who were struggling with the loss. She understood "the fragility of those left behind." She simply let them grieve and held their hands throughout the grieving period. Her counsellees found hope and strength through her.

Miss Mary Matthew is a Christian.

How salty are we in this world, that we make others thirsty for the hope and strength Jesus has given us?

Very often we judge others using ourselves as a yardstick, our own human holiness, righteousness. Oswald Chambers draws to mind that this is a warped perspective, that it is a denial of the "reality of the natural life," in that we are not holy or righteous; we are not above anyone in our sinful nature. Pride says, "I have a right to myself," "I am better than you!" But pride did not save us. Pride was man’s downfall. Love saved us. His love. Read on.

~~~~~~~

Oswald Chambers

I cannot save and sanctify myself; I cannot make atonement for sin; I cannot redeem the world; I cannot right what is wrong, purify what is impure, or make holy what is unholy. That is all the sovereign work of God. Do I have faith in what Jesus Christ has done? He has made the perfect atonement for sin. Am I in the habit of constantly realizing it? The greatest need we have is not to do things, but to believe things. The redemption of Christ is not an experience, it is the great act of God which He has performed through Christ, and I have to build my faith on it. If I construct my faith on my own experience, I produce the most unscriptural kind of life— an isolated life, with my eyes focused solely on my own holiness. Beware of that human holiness that is not based on the atonement of the Lord. It has no value for anything except a life of isolation— it is useless to God and a nuisance to man. Measure every kind of experience you have by our Lord Himself. We cannot do anything pleasing to God unless we deliberately build on the foundation of the atonement by the Cross of Christ.

The atonement of Jesus must be exhibited in practical, unassuming ways in my life. Every time I obey, the absolute deity of God is on my side, so that the grace of God and my natural obedience are in perfect agreement. Obedience means that I have completely placed my trust in the atonement, and my obedience is immediately met by the delight of the supernatural grace of God.

Beware of the human holiness that denies the reality of the natural life— it is a fraud. Continually bring yourself to the trial or test of the atonement and ask, "Where is the discernment of the atonement in this, and in that?"

I inherited this book from Novi and Ken’s garage sale, titled, "Words on Strength and Peseverance". I particularly like this quote,

In the depth of winter, I finally learnt that within me there lay an invincible summer.

~~Albert Camus

it’s odd how we fall in love with people who do not fulfill our list. having the list can place unrealistic expectations on the other person and the relationship. Ps Ed said when you place the control in God’s hands, you will flow in His peace. It doesn’t really matter if he is not as bubbly, spontaneous, or ______________ (fill in the blank), because sometimes love is just this mysterious. You love the person despite the list. I can’t explain it. I don’t think anyone can.

Somethings you just gotta leave it to God’s control. Well it’s either God’s control, the devil’s control or yours. No brainer right?

So I threw out the list. I am not tailoring or custom-ordering a life-partner. To look out for though are emotional maturity, spiritual maturity, personal integrity, rootedness, AND a zest for life! Wouldn’t hurt if he’s nerdy-looking! They are always in!

it was a crystal-clear moment. like the moon has risen and shining over the lake and you can see even clearer its depth and what kind of fishes there are swimming in it. not just merely knowing that it’s 2 ft deep with fishes in it.